Two months ago, Elsa arrived, and we, as a family, could suddenly fill over half of a mini-van. Where once there was one carseat, now there is two. What I’d like to tell you is that I’m caught up! We’re back on a consistent daily routine! All of us are happy all of the time!
But the reality is that sometimes Owen wakes up for the day at 5:15 instead of 7:00. Sometimes Elsa eats every two hours, sometimes she’ll go four. Baskets of unfolded laundry are slowly taking over my house. And sometimes I feel like I’m caught up in a swirling cyclone of unanswered mail.
We are adjusting. It’s slow but sure.
It’s usally 9:30 at night before I have a minute to really sit down and breathe. And by that point, all I want is to watch something mindless. But all throughout the day, there are thousands of moments: the absurd, the hilarious, the anxious, the deeply sad. And I am processing these moments, ever aware of how much they are changing me.
More often than not, I am alone with these reflections during the day. At times, I try them out on Owen; he usually responds with a request (“Play castle?”), a demand (“Juice please!”), or complete silence. It is not amazingly helpful.
And so I write. Sometimes just a jotted sentence as a reminder. Sometimes a flood of words the second both kids are sleeping during naptime. Sometimes something more structured later that night. But I write to process…and then make Eric read it while I intently watch his face (it’s as annoying as it sounds).
I am trying so hard to embrace all of the changes that this additional little one has brought with her. To “Carpé the crap out of this Season” as we like to say. And part of doing that will be making some changes to the blog. Going forward, I’d love to share some of these reflections with you.
Don’t worry. There will still be recipes because there are just so many cheese-based dishes out there that I have yet to try. And the recipes will still be seasonal. But on a somewhat regular basis, I plan to throw my non-culinary thoughts out there too. Doing this will free up a little extra time for me to nibble on my newborn’s cheeks rather than take 124 pictures of (increasingly cold) enchiladas…but more importantly, I’m hoping it will give me further chances to connect with you!
I’m so grateful for all of you who read Carpé Season. And I’m so grateful for the people I’ve met – virtually and for reals – through this little corner of the World Wide Web. I hope you know that.
Here’s to new seasons.